are you so shy because you have an std?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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