he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
