How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
and she was petting her beer can
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Two words: blizzard sex
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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