I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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