Where did you get a picture of my penis
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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