forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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