Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Are we still banned from the library?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
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