it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
someone threw a dead crab at me
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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