I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
