GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
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