I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize