It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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