I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
