this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
