You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
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This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
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Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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