this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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