apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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