Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
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