do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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