I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
