sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
