I need help removing her.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
