The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Every concussion has its silver lining
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize