I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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