Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..