he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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