We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize