Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
