Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
