anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
