i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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