I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize