He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
