Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
