I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
