So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
