I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
