I have demons in me.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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