you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
There r osticjed everywhere
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize