is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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