Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I think my vagina is haunted
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize