I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
