I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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