Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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