I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
