i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
These tits shall not be calmed
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
