You don't have asthma, your pregnant
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize