please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
