apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Rumble strips road head = magical
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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