1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
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