This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
