Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
