god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Randomize